Last nite for the first time, Felicia slept with her nanny. My mom in law has told me many times that Felicia should sleep in the nursery room with her nanny, while my hubby and I slept in different room.
Of course I didn't have the heart to let her sleep alone with a stranger, so until yesterday she always slept with us or with my mum in the nursery room while I got sick last week.
But now that I'm feeling better, Ming didn't feel well. Apparently there's a flu epidemic in the office. So Ming and Felicia can't sleep in the same room. For the first couple of nights, I slept in the nursery room with the nanny and Felicia.
But after a while, well...I miss my hubby too. So yesterday I decided that the nanny has stayed with us for quite some time and I can trust her. sort of.
Last nite I stayed up until 3Am. I couldn't sleep and kept making visits to the nursery room. I still fed her at 11:30pm, then again at 2:30 am. then my baby was up and I still got the chance to hold her until 3:00am. I gave up then, feeling so exhausted. my nanny told me that my baby stayed up until 4am before finally sleeping again.
tonite, I'm going to do the same, going to set up the alarm at her feeding time and making visits to her room. Of course my parents didn't know. they'll be horrified if they found out that Felicia didn't sleep with us at nite.
But I thought, well, it's not as if I abandoned her...and I will still stay with her when she's up...
anyway, this morning, after restless sleep, i woke up at 10:30am....hahahaha...then I asked Ming to go to the mall...doing some grocery shopping and eating out. I've never thought I'd be so happy going to the mall....but let's face it, I haven't been out much in the past month, and I'm happy to get ANY chance of doing something different...
Of course, my mum called me, warning me that: 1). I shouldn't be going out before the 40th day and 2). I shouldn't leave my baby with the nanny for long. (apparently 2 hours are still too long).
I felt horrible now. feeling fat and ugly. everyone keep saying how fat I'm getting and my mum in law even said that I shouldn't feed my baby too much, what if she's getting fat like me??
at the same time, they all said that I should keep eating a lot so that I'm in good health.
wtf???
I just thought...I don't want to get pregnant again. horrible eh? I hate thinking like that, but it's so very true. I just thought, man, it's difficult losing 10KG. last time I did it, it take me a whole year, horrible exercise, diet pills, and not eating rice.
And now they gave me that look again. the "oh-my-god-you're-so-fat" look again. and it makes me well...depressed.
Of course Ming has been kind and understanding. He didn't say anything about my weight. yet. hhh....
anyway...don't want to continue writing now... i thought I'll feel better but apparently not.
I have at least 5KG to lose before I start going back to work next month. and honestly, I don't know how I can lose it...(So far I did exercise, reduce food intake, and taking detox, and I lost 5KG fast, but then got stuck at my current weight....hhhh....)
any ideas guys?
Of course I didn't have the heart to let her sleep alone with a stranger, so until yesterday she always slept with us or with my mum in the nursery room while I got sick last week.
But now that I'm feeling better, Ming didn't feel well. Apparently there's a flu epidemic in the office. So Ming and Felicia can't sleep in the same room. For the first couple of nights, I slept in the nursery room with the nanny and Felicia.
But after a while, well...I miss my hubby too. So yesterday I decided that the nanny has stayed with us for quite some time and I can trust her. sort of.
Last nite I stayed up until 3Am. I couldn't sleep and kept making visits to the nursery room. I still fed her at 11:30pm, then again at 2:30 am. then my baby was up and I still got the chance to hold her until 3:00am. I gave up then, feeling so exhausted. my nanny told me that my baby stayed up until 4am before finally sleeping again.
tonite, I'm going to do the same, going to set up the alarm at her feeding time and making visits to her room. Of course my parents didn't know. they'll be horrified if they found out that Felicia didn't sleep with us at nite.
But I thought, well, it's not as if I abandoned her...and I will still stay with her when she's up...
anyway, this morning, after restless sleep, i woke up at 10:30am....hahahaha...then I asked Ming to go to the mall...doing some grocery shopping and eating out. I've never thought I'd be so happy going to the mall....but let's face it, I haven't been out much in the past month, and I'm happy to get ANY chance of doing something different...
Of course, my mum called me, warning me that: 1). I shouldn't be going out before the 40th day and 2). I shouldn't leave my baby with the nanny for long. (apparently 2 hours are still too long).
At first I felt great. I found jeans that still fit me, and I took it as good sign. But then I met 3 people who revel at my weight gain. At first I laughed with one of them, but by the third person, who didn't recognize me by the way, I started feeling horrible. One of them is my best friend who took a good look at me from top down, and said, "you seemed to be fatter from the last time I saw you"...well, I did still have 10 KG to lose!!! but then again, come on man!!! it's not even yet a month after I gave birth!! I'd like to see how she looks like when she gave birth later on...
I felt horrible now. feeling fat and ugly. everyone keep saying how fat I'm getting and my mum in law even said that I shouldn't feed my baby too much, what if she's getting fat like me??
at the same time, they all said that I should keep eating a lot so that I'm in good health.
wtf???
I just thought...I don't want to get pregnant again. horrible eh? I hate thinking like that, but it's so very true. I just thought, man, it's difficult losing 10KG. last time I did it, it take me a whole year, horrible exercise, diet pills, and not eating rice.
And now they gave me that look again. the "oh-my-god-you're-so-fat" look again. and it makes me well...depressed.
Of course Ming has been kind and understanding. He didn't say anything about my weight. yet. hhh....
anyway...don't want to continue writing now... i thought I'll feel better but apparently not.
I have at least 5KG to lose before I start going back to work next month. and honestly, I don't know how I can lose it...(So far I did exercise, reduce food intake, and taking detox, and I lost 5KG fast, but then got stuck at my current weight....hhhh....)
any ideas guys?
8 comments:
i cant understand how ppl can be so inconsiderate and rude to say to you that you are fat???? so what??!!!! really, i mean, you are fat, maybe they are pesek, or ireng, or kero, or kere. ok, id better stop now before i kill ppl with my words. but really, ignore them, you shouldnt let their words influence you. but im not saying that you should stop your effort to get back to your normal size. you have to do it now. i heard it will get difficult if you do later. but you shouldnt think of not getting pregnant again, as you said, its God`s gifts :)
actually i got a discount card from my friend to do this shaping body, i chose to shape my waist. they did massage and heat me up, you wont believe the sweat that came out of me. anyways, then they said that i need to lift my hip and buttock up and i need to lose some fat on my upper knee and that i need to do this and that, wtf!!! they`re trying to rip me off!!! of couse im not dumb. i love my body and i know whats best. the hell what they said!!!!
arachi??!!
agree with ce Vini...ndengerno orang laen tu ga ada enteke ce...they'll find your tiny lil smallest deep down weakness, no matter what..
but hey, nothing's wrong when U wanna loose your weight for yourself though...U know, not because of those people let U down for what they say...so why dont U try Marie-France Bodyline? d TP...it's better than Devino, I heard...U can contact Novita, it worked to her until she stopped consulting before her schedule was finished.. .
I wanted to tell ya Vivi, but I love you too much! All I have to say is..take picture from the side view hmm?
well, considering that I am 25 and STILL struggling with my weight (mind you, my mom even said that I looked -- and I quote -- "fatter than Vivi who's pregnant and about to give birth... and you're not even pregnant nor married yet!"), I don't think I am in the position of having anything to say here.
Screw the others. If you wanna lose weight, great, do it for yourself. Not for others. Not for the sake of your inlaws or friends or blahhh. You just popped out a 4 KG baby out of your tummy, you're lucky you don't have 28 kgs surplus like my mom used to have.
Try the slimming marie france thingies, I think Cici has a point.
Or go to the gym more often. Billy Bootcamp *Shierly Imoet's recommendation* has been helping me to shape the abs and muscles.
Healthy food n more water always help.
Mind you, the best way for me to go on a diet is to be stressed out! :-D I have been swimming and dieting like crazy for the past few weeks without any success, and last week, just because I have A LOT of stress and frustration at work, I suddenly lost 2 kgs out of nowhere... just like the gone 10 kgs last year after the break up, hehehehe... not that I'm advising you to break up Ming lhoooo :-P
Point is, some diets n efforts work, some don't. Don't take it too hard. True, you should start doing it now cos some friends of mine actually got BIGGER than the time when they're pregnant, and that's creepy, esp. when the kids are reaching age 1 or 2 already, you'll start asking questions like "isn't it about time that your body goes back to the normal shape?"
So love your body and don't get too stressed out. If you're bored, do exercises at home. Try doing it everyday like Shierly does. It helps, apparently even better than doing it few times a week.
Ok, Sweetie?
Thanks for the support guys....yeah, I'm doing billy boot camp like...one week after giving birth. not on full scale though, since sometimes the stitches still hurts...
and I did hear about marie france...want to try it, but now I'm still on detox and hopefully it'll help while I look for info on marie france.
I just don't get it why suddenly after dropping 1KG PER DAY, it stops! with 9KG to go...
and Han, the thing is, I know I'm fat(ter) after giving birth...but I don't think I'm SHAPELESS, and I don't have fat hanging out of my waist etc...
I just look bigger (what an excuse huh? hahahahaha)...but I just hate it how people can be so insensitive. then again, those three people haven't given birth yet...
please remember, we are not barby, so what, they are not ken either. next time when ppl say that you r fat, just tell them that they are ugly...tusche!!! again, shame on me, as christian i must say that we should forgive...org seng bilang kamu gendut pasti gak lulus sma toh? or smp? well, its hard to deal with uneducated ppl since we have diff level you know. so just ignore them, dont waste your time thinking about some unethical, uneducational ppl.
Do you know the best way to get your normal weight back after giving birth?!
No nanny, no maid, must deal with always-crying-and-asking-for-a-hug baby, house chores (I finished cleaning everything at 11 p.m everyday), and a little bit exercise with hula hoop :p
Got my normal body shape less than 2 months after giving birth
Kamu abis operasi gak apa2 kah doing billy bootcamp?!?!
I'm doing it now and really satisfied with the result.
dear Ce,
LOVE your comment huahauhauhauhuaa...
Moet, I got Billy boot camp from my sis, and well, like I said, I can do 80% of them, the rest I think is still too hard on my stitches.
and yeah, i still wake up every nite to watch my baby eat and just to hold her as long as I could afterwards until she went back to sleep. But gotta say that there's no way I'd do the laundry here and do everything like you did there...
(thoug it is very tempting...)
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